iSherri

Well, not so much the Customs agent who works the border and hassled me about failing to stop at the stop sign prior to approaching his little booth (it’s a damn lie!). 

Regardless, we had a lovely drive from Niagara to Toronto. 

Along the way we stopped at a tourist area for maps. That guy was much friendlier and told us that we were just in time to catch the Canadian National Exposition (CNE). Not having any better plans for a Friday night, we decided to meet up with Aruna and head that way.

The Canadian National Exposition is a lot like the Del Mar Fair. There was a carnival area with lots of carnies (small hands, smell like cabbage). Since none of us had eaten dinner, we started with the food. We found a giant food pavillion and headed right for the Poutine.

Poutine is a Canadian delicacy that consists of french fries drenched in gravy and cheese curds. In addition to the traditional Poutine, we also triend the Canadian Poutine (had bacon) and the Mexican Poutine (had assorted Mexican toppings).

Next we enjoyed hot waffles and ice cream. 

I tried a palm reading to see what the future holds (master bucket list, check!), but all I learned was that I am surrounded by negative energy and while I may think I am pretty happy and others may think I’m really happy, on the inside I am a mess and for a small additional fee, Madame would be happy to remove the energy for me…

I decided to lug my negativity away with me and spend the rest of my Canadian dollars on drink instead. We found a lovely “beach”, ordered some sangria and enjoyed watching the rest of the crowd wander by.

Niagara Falls has the greatest french fries in the world.

Our day began when we left the Clearfield Hampton Inn and hit the open highway.

Along the way we stumbled across the Zippo Museum. How could we not stop? That would be like driving past the world’s largest skillet (which is located in Iowa, I’m told).

After a few photos, we hopped back into the car and headed up to the falls.

While I haven’t ever seen a waterfall like that, Evelyn has lived for a bit in Brazil and she was not impressed.

The first activity we did was the Cave of the Winds.

We donned the lovely yellow hefty bags and headed out.

The interesting thing about the Cave of the Winds is that there isn’t a cave. It’s actually just a series of platforms that are VERY close to the American Falls. Evelyn even survived her time on the closest platform, Hurricane Ridge.

Next up was riding the Maid of the Mists under the falls.

We switched out the yellow hefty bag ponchos for some pretty blue ones. Given the temperature, I felt a lot like a hot, sweaty, smurf.

The boats went fairly close to the falls, but not all they way. Evelyn was not impressed.

After a quick trip to the viewing platform…

And a little love for Tesla…

We headed off to Canada.

What better way to pregame for our road trip to Alabama next week than with a road trip to Canada this week?

Evelyn and I had a four day weekend and got a head start by hitting the road shortly after work on Thursday.

Our first stop was on the 495 just across the MD state line. Yes friends, the Beltway traffic was heavy.

Once it cleared we continued onto PA.

The route we took would have been considerably shorter had we taken the right exit off the Turnpike.

Even though our route was extended, it was lovely to drive through the mountains during sunset.

The first day of our drive taught us some valuable lessons about convertible ownership. First of all, going topless allows you to enjoy nature more. As we drove through Maryland, we picked up a hop on. Literally.

Also, lots of friends have told me riding with my top off but my windows up will keep me nice and toasty. Sadly, this myth was dispelled long before the temperature plunged below sixty.

In fact, installing the wind shield and firing up the heated seats didn’t prevent the near hypothermia from any surface areas not in direct contact with said seats. In the future, Evelyn and will both attempt to dress appropriately.

Finally, we discovered it’s fun to guess where you are based upon the local scents. And, boy howdy, there are a lot of livestock in Pennsylvania. Stay tuned for Day Two or as I like to call it, the Niagara Falls Follies!

Ever feel like your life is a movie plot? Evelyn and I decided to spend the weekend in the mountains maintaining my Hilton Honors Diamond status and using some of our Living Social vouchers.

Evelyn picked me up early so we’d have time to hit the outlet malls on our way.

After a quick lunch at Wegmans, we headed to the Leesburg Outlets. The trip to the outlets was super productive, but took a lot longer than we anticipated which caused us to miss the first winery on our agenda. Thankfully, we still had time to visit the Mediterranean Cellars.

Afterwards,we stumbled across Marterella Wineray, which had better wine AND wine slushies! Bonus!

That’s when things took a turn towards the absurd. First we ran very low on gas.

We drove into Warrenton to fill up and noticed a Tiffany Blue colored convertable bug on a lot next to the station. Evelyn said “We should stop and look…”

After drooling over the beautiful car, we headed to dinner at a lovely little establishment called Twisted Sisters. Apparently the name of the restaurant had nothing to do with their musical selection, since we were forced to endure county music throughout the meal. The seafood was delicious though and we had plenty of time to google financing options.

After a lovely stay in the lovely town of Winchester, we headed over to the Luray Caverns, by way of Dinosaur Land.

Waiting in line to get in, we were surrounded by cub scouts and treated to the melodic sounds of a pan flute band. With amplification. When we finally got inside, they had a self guided tour, with random tour guides who imparted lots of useless information about cave formations, “there are hundreds of kinds of stalactites all of which I will tell you about right now”.

We snagged some Subway sandwiches on our way out and up to Skyline Drive for a picnic. 

The views were stunning. 

We ate a quick lunch (nats) and then headed down the mountain. A quick trip to a local farmers marked netted some pumpkin butter, cherry apple cider, and a few peaches. 

Evelyn made friends with some of the locals before we headed on our way.

On our way back, we drove through Warrenton. Since the Tiffany Bug was still on the lot, it seemed like a great time to stop for a test drive. 

When we got back to the lot, Evelyn unleashed her super negotiator skills and I fired up the Google machine. We talked the dealer down and inked the deal. 

Evelyn and I headed back to the winery with the wine slushies to celebrate.

The end!

It was a very special weekend for me, friends. My BFF decided to visit so Evelyn and I took her with us on one of our bucket list adventures.

We started the adventure at Drink the District. They hand out tiny little plastic beer mugs and then allow you to sample different craft brews. The hard cider and Abita’s Purple Haze were my personal favorites. The venue included a band, cornhole games, and the ever popular food trucks. 

We all agreed the Bahn Mi from the Lemongrass truck was the best choice. Delish, but why no Sauca? Anyhow, on our way out we stopped to join a Greenpeace protest of KFC. Seriously, now that I’m boycotting KFC and Chic Fil A, my fast food chicken options are rapidly decreasing. If I hadn’t given up fast food altogether when I left suburbia I would be sorta concerned.

We strolled all around the city (thanks for nothing Siri!) and found NPR and a beautiful public library with interesting art. 

Finally we made it to Chinatown to hop on the Metro.

The trains weren’t busy so we snagged some seats and enjoyed the rides to Capital South.

Upon arrival we hoofed it over to the Botanical Gardens. If you haven’t ever been to a botanical garden before you should absolutely visit this one. Then you won’t reallize how small it is compared to many others! Despite the diminutive size, the gardens are lush and lovely. 

They are divided into several different sections. I particularly enjoyed the Hawaiian section, and not just because it was the coldest! It also has beautiful water features. There is a fantastic skywalk that allows you to walk around the perimiter of the Jungle Room as well and provides lovely views of the capital.

As we left, we discovered one of the presidential monuments. For those of you keeping score at home, this monument was for James Garfield. It sits just across the street from the gardens and just south of the capital. 

Heading back to the Metro, we discovered another protest! This was the Anti Frack Attack or the Stop Fracking March. I texted in my support. Fracking is bad, very bad.

Afterwards, Evelyn and Jenni climed a tree to get out of the heat. But climbing trees and protesting is thirsty work. Which is totally was totally why we stopped into the Tortilla Coast for a frosty pitcher of margaritas. 

And a special message for my local friends, the Jalepeno Bacon margaritas won’t be available again until after September. Who know that was a seasonal beverage…

Thirst quenched, we headed across the river for a spot of shopping on King Street. 

We had dinner at Aquaviva (have the tripleta sandwich, thank me later) and then rounded out the evening with some fantastic skee ball and shuffleboard at the Light Horse. 

A fantastic day with fantastic friends and two items checked off the list! Winning!

One would think that telling your friends to meet you under the giant silver tree would assist with your meetup. Sadly, not during Jazz in the Garden when you are trying to find a blond girl who is sitting with a few of her friends and people are packed in around the trunk tighter than traffic on the 95 at 4:30 on a holiday weekend. 

For what it’s worth, jazz is not my genre, Frankly, I’d rather listen to a plane load of cranky two year olds all yelling different things at the same time. And come to think of it, that’s kind of what some of those songs sounded like. Maybe sitting right next to the speaker was not the right seat for me. But we did have a few giant pitchers of Sangria and that helped to dull the throbbing pain in my ears.

We drank more Sangria. A lot more.

And then Sharlene’s new friends had to go. They were off to Virginia. Evelyn and I parted ways with Sharlene as well and ventured on to Truckaroo. 

Truckaroo is a food truck extravaganza at the Washington Nationals Stadium. The circle the trucks and in the center is a stage with a band playing real music. Really loud real music! We caught the Metro over and headed right in for a delicious lobster roll before calling it a night and heading home. Evelyn was leaving for Brooklyn at the crack of dawn and it was already pretty late.

One would think that would be the end of the evening, no? Sadly, there was track work on the yellow line and the Metro dumped us out at Pentagon City. The herded us onto a “fee shuttle” that was supposed to take us the final two stops to Braddock Street. Theoretically, we could have made the trip in less than 10 minutes. Unfortunately, the bus driver must have been drunk too and took a wrong turn and ended up taking the GW Parkway in the opposite direction. Those of you who don’t live here may not know this, but once you get on the GW Parkway heading in the wrong direction, it’s nearly impossible to get off until you get to Maryland. Which is exactly what happened to us. thankfully, the crowd on the bus was good natured and we amused ourselves by pulling the “stop requested” cord repeatedly, imagining how long it would take us to find restrooms if we ever did stop, and comparing our tats. 

I love this city!

On America’s birthday, what better way to celebrate than with a patriotic brunch and fireworks on the Mall? 

The day began with a senic drive through Maryland. And sure, it may have taken an extra hour, but at least I avoided the holiday traffic!

After brunch we went to Sharlene’s for some Slutty Brownies and a short nap (passed out). Sharlene invited us to crash a BBQ she was going to attend. The hosts were lovely and fed us and made us feel very welcome. They invited us to stay and watch the fireworks. They have a lovely rooftop terrace AND they are on a hill, so I am sure the view would have been sweet. 

But Evelyn and I were determined to make it to the Mall in time to watch the show with the huddled masses. We left the party, hoofed it to the U Street Metro, caught the first train in, hopped off at the Archives, trekked over to the Mall (doubletime!) and arrived about 30 seconds before the show began! 

Twenty minutes later, we hoofed it back to Archives, caught the first train, and arrived back at the U Street stop before Sharlene had even left the party! And they said it couldn’t be done…

Ben’s Chili Bowl is a Washington Landmark. It says so on the sign above the door. We chose a good time to visit because it was Happy Hour at Ben’s Next Door so we were able to enjoy our chili dogs without waiting in line and with a cold adult beverage at a more than reasonable price.

It’s easy to see why presidents and Food Network hosts dine there. The dogs are delish! Afterwards we headded over to Policy in time to catch the semifinals of the District Karaoke Championships. This is a league where teams compete and boy howdy do they spend some time plotting their strategy! We sat on the rooftop patio listening in for a bit and watched until the competition began, then we headed indoors to enjoy. 

Sharlene found us a semi private booth to witness the fun. 

My favorite performer turned out an espicailly moving rendition of What’s Love Got to Do With It. He performed while carrying around an iPad with an Anderson Cooper slideshow. Touching and topical. I hope he won, though we didn’t stay for the announcement of the finalists. 

We met up with Monica and headed over to Masa 14 where we scored some prime window seats and engaged in our favorite hobby of people watching. There was plenty to see with what seemed like a huge chunk of the population strolling by or stopping in.

Afterwards, we stopped at Manny & Olgas to get a slice before walking Sharlene home. The slice morphed into an entire pizza and Sharlene and I enjoyed watching Monica and Evelyn harass the ATM users while we waited. Once again a fantastic night in the District and another check off on the bucket list! It’s good to be me!

This post is an attempt to clarify the glaring omission of the 930 club on my original bucket list. The 930 club is an institution. I should know since I attended a Circle Jerks concert there with opening act Gang Green back in the day! This week Evelyn and I went with our friend Erin to watch the epic performance of the Scissor Sisters.

Our evening began with a few happy hours with Sharlene. We tried a few bites at Vinoteca and The Tap and Parlor before Erin and Evelyn joined us. The next stop was Nellie’s, a fantastic gay bar that served buckets of corndogs (food on a stick is the native food of Iowans).

Finally it was off to the show. The venue was perfect! We climbed to the second floor and stood behind some super sweaty Baby Daddy fans. Rye Rye opened and she and her back up dancers really got us fired up. Even the hairy and shirtless Baby Daddy fans totally enjoyed her performance. 

While we waited for the band, I chatted up the Baby Daddy fans. They were impressed with my Anna Matronic 50s style tribute dress and eventually invited me to stand amongst them when the concert began. While this resulted in a much better view and significantly small chance of tipping off the ledge above, they were a little smelly and would have been much more attractive wearing their shirts. On the other hand, Their “Baby Daddy, Baby Daddy” chanting was fun to join in with and the band seemed to get a real kick out of it.

The show started off strong and built to an amazing climax but there were a couple of highlights I would love to mention. First of all, I had forgotten how much fun Kiss You Off was and have totally added it to my post-divorce playlist. 

The last time I saw the Scissor Sisters, one of the highlights were Jake Shears abs. While it certainly donesn’t appear that he is obsessing over keeping them sculpted any more, the crowd went wild as he began stripping down. 

The show climaxed with an outstanding rendition of Music Is the Victim and Jake Shears blue mesh jumpsuit. Although I tried really hard to spot Pandora Boxx during the crowd surfing, I was out of luck. 

The only thing better than attending the 930 club is seeing the Scissor Sisters there. If you ever get a chance to go, I highly recommend it!